A few days ago I got a ride from Cook Doctor and company to go to the Wal-Mart in Fayetteville, PA. Cook Doctor has a good (or bad?) Sense of humor. In the parking lot, he hit his e-brake and it sounded like he hit a car in the lot. I was worried but I guess the look on my face was anger. Definitely not, but I understand.
When I said I was more worried, Cook Doctor said, “That rings in a therapist’s head, ‘Control freak. Control freak.” Cook Doctor continues with a 4 word sermon given to him about control. “You don’t have any.”
We got back to the trail but had to play catch up and I hiked ahead of Gummy Bear and Air Bud. Alone, I got to reflect.
I’ve had a very regular life up until recently. I didn’t realize how this trip has impacted myself and others… starting the trip, friends would comment about how much of an inspiration I am.
Why? I’m just walking…
At a hiker feed, a trail angel gave a very powerful speech about how thru hikers put their lives on hold and change the speed at which we live for this trail. And that’s extraordinary. I never thought of it that way.
Anyway, reflecting on life I’ve always thought that I was a product of my choices. I led myself down this path. Raised a Christian, I believe that God had impact but ultimately, I made my decisions bringing me here.
Cook Doctor’s sermon made me think about how I’m not ever in control. Not fully. I can control my actions, my reactions, and my emotions (sometimes) but no one else’s.
How can I carry that into my life at home? Where can I improve my understanding of others’ pasts to be a better steward?
As I press forward on the trail, I plan to reflect more on this. Right now my thoughts are kind of jumbled just typing on the phone screen so I’ll probably journal it and update this post.
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